Update 4/17/10 Day 159

Dear friends,

The wheelchair ramp is history.

Swell Steven, Jovial Jon Michael, and Brother Donnie (the kidlet) took the thing down. (They even had a little help from Ian the Jubilant with Little Brother Noah on the side). I am so grateful to these dear folks who prove the continued and tenacious care for our family as we "ease on down the road". I felt like I would cry at one point during the "de-construction", because I remembered that cold day in December when the crew came just before Christmas to get the thing up before Smitty got home from Sunnyview. I remember so well wheeling Stephen up the ramp for the first time, and the tears we both shed when he returned to his own home. Every screw unscrewed, every board pulled up, represented so much more than wood and metal. There was love in the putting up, and love in the taking down. And there was plenty of love in between, when that ramp became the bridge between a hospital and home for my beloved husband.

How well I remember turning the corner on the ramp with the fixator leg sticking out, and being oh so careful not to bump the blasted thing! And helping Steve get his coat on to go out in the cold, when his arm wouldn't bend. I think of Smitty hopping with the walker to get in the passenger's side of the car, and me loading the wheelchair into the back, usually getting the wet from the wheels all over my coat. Those memories will stay with me forever. But so will the vignettes of the guys letting their hot chocolate get cold while they figured out the best way to put the ramp together. So will the picture of Tom Terrific putting in those wide doors in my bathroom and bedroom. So will the evenings (very late) when I would write to all of you as a way of making it through the cold, dark winter nights without Stephen at home. These and a thousand other stories are sewn in to the fabric of my life. The Great One alone knows the ultimate design. As my beautiful Aunt Evie used to tell me, "we see the knotty side of the tapestry, but God sees the finished front..."

A symbol and a help has been torn down. The Great One does this all through our lives, as he helps us grow up in to the next challenge. He knows when we are strong enough to leave something behind, or when we realize our weakness enough to hold on to Him, and let go of an earthly crutch. However it plays out, change is inevitable and right. Still, sometimes we have emotions about the fixtures from our pasts. They are the stuff of bittersweet memories, and the steps to higher places where the view will be breathtaking.

Bless you my friends. My heart is full.

Your friend on the pilgrim road,

Loriann