Saturday, May 8, 2010

Update 5/8/10 6 months since crash

Dear friends,

The cold and damp stick stubbornly to my soul today. The Great One brought me through the worst winter of my life without a hint of depression (sadness, yes, but not "the great gray cloud"). And now, here I am in the heart of spring, with the tell tale signs: wanting to sleep too much, eat too much, withdrawal, etc... I know the signs all too well. I usually battle this thing every winter, with its corresponding let up in the spring. But for some reason I feel the slope now. Don't worry about me. I have passed through this shadow before and I will again. In fact, I am only telling you this for 2 reasons: one, I know without a doubt that God is there with us when we can't feel His presence at all. Have hope, friends! Number 2, I promised to tell the truth in this blog, and to pretend I'm feeling fine when I'm not would be dishonest. So there it is. We all go through the sludgie times. It's part of walking the pilgrim road.

Can you believe it? It has been exactly 6 months since the terrible accident that brought this blog into being. Half a year. Some days it seems like yesterday. Other days it seems like a hundred years ago. But it always lives somewhere in the back of my head. Life has changed, and the changes are permanent. My launching point for viewing life is altered. But mostly for the better. You bloggies have been a big part of that. That so many have cared, and listened, and loved my family has given me courage in the storm. Thank you again.

Tonite's post is short. I'm making chicken and rice, and keeping busy. No fetal positions here. The fight is on, again, to stay out of the pit. One thing I know for sure: The Holy Spirit brings light in the darkness. I went to see my friend Judy W. in the hospital today, and the light was all over the room. And they've battled the monster like true warriors. There are men in Afghanistan right now whose troubles make mine look like melted ice cream on a hot day. They have no time to coddle their sorrows. There are some of you, who have lost children, and jobs, and health, who beat back the darkness when you get out of bed in the morning. You are all my heroes. There is One, who descended into hell and made it possible for the captives to be set free forever. His light never fails. He's my all time most beloved champion.

March on, be strong. There's a world of good out there. You are a big part of mine.

Your friend on the pilgrim road,


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