Update 3/28/10 19 weeks since crash

Dear friends,

It was positively surreal this evening, back at work at Albany Med, on a Sunday. My excellent friend Jackie was sitting across from me, much as it was 19 weeks ago. So many memories came rushing back, some of them painful but most of them good. I thought of the noble, hardworking people who rescued Stephen and Hannah from the wreck. I remembered the trauma team in the ER, painstakingly stitching Hannah's cuts and lacerations. My dear Pastors, Pastor Dave and Pastor Greg, and Sisters Laurie and Lisa absorbing all the hard news with me. I can still see the faces in the waiting room, so many faces, sharing our suffering, praying like there was no tomorrow. Steve's family, travelling in the middle of the night from far away places to be here in case Stephen died. And on, and on, and on. Then, winter was closing in. Now, winter is trekking out. I guess our lives will always have an invisible dividing line on November 8, 2009. I'm not far enough out to know for sure. But from my present, limited perspective I would gamble on it.

The Great One deserves mountains of praise for all He has done during these intense weeks. Stephen is not only walking, he's working. And this morning, my sweet Miss Rejoice played keyboard and sang back up during worship at church. (Our youth "Generation Church", executed the entire service this Palm Sunday). I was the human sponge watching her there, able to experience life and worship and God. No, everything is not perfect, but it never will be this side of heaven. Still, it is beyond all I could have hoped. And time will continue to show the work of God in the lives of my loved ones. Stunning.

I think you will find my posts on Sundays, Tuesdays and Thursdays will be getting shorter. I'm a working girl again, and I don't get home until 11:15, so something's got to give. But I have a commitment to write a blog entry every night, whether anyone ever reads it or not. (I do so appreciate all of you who do read. I continue to be flabbergasted by the folks who approach me to tell me they read every day!) Ultimately, though, this public diary is an act of devotion to the One and Only, and He has, I believe, directed me to keep writing until it's time to stop. I'd like to get through to November 8, 2010. So many doctors have told me, "wait a year". And really, at this point in my life, 365 days rocket by. I know I'll have some kind of view from this mountain by then, and alot more perspective.

I close with a bit of the Psalm that meant so much to me in the early days of this experience:

"The cords of death entangled me;
the torrents of destruction overwhelmed me.
The cords of the grave coiled around me;
the snares of death confronted me.
In my distress I called to the Lord;
I cried to my God for help.
From His temple He heard my voice;
My cry came before Him, into His ears."
Psalm 18:4-6

Thank you, my most dear Friend, greater than the highest earthly king, kind, loving and forgiving, full of grace and truth. To you I owe it all. Help me live what I believe!

And to you, my companions here on the dusty plain of our mortal lives, what can I say? You have given me hope. You make me better than I am. You make me climb much higher than I ever could without you. We've got a ways to go. But we're doing it. We're doing it!

Peter J., I'm so proud of you I could bust! Your message this morning was absolutely inspiring! I know the Great One was beaming too, at your humility and love for the lonely, hurting, frustrated souls without hope in this world. Thanks for reminding us it's our job every day to seek them out and love them for who they are.

Keep praying for Judy W. Thank you, and I mean it sincerely.

Your tired, grateful friend on the pilgrim road,

Loriann