Update 1/10/10 Day 63

Dear friends,

Pastor Dave the Humble was inspirational today in his sermon on prayer. To say I am a believer in this ancient communication would be an understatement. To say I'm good at it would be a lie. To say I long to learn to talk to and listen to the Great One with more perseverance and faith would be to express the raw desire of my heart. Every one of us going through this recovery, (and I mean all of my fellow travellers), has seen God say "yes" to so many of our requests. But as Pastor Dave so perfectly expressed with a beautiful analogy (you'll have to listen on line to hear it!), the ultimate blessing of asking God is being with God. Relationship is where it's at. If you have been waiting for a prayer to be answered, don't give up. So many things happen in the invisible world that we don't understand. I have many prayers yet unanswered from many years past. I prayed for years for my mother to be set free from the hell of schizophrenia, but she died in her illness at age 60. Did that prayer go unanswered? According to scripture "Every valley shall be exalted, and every mountain and hill made low, the crooked, straight, and the rough places plain..." Once again I say He is Good. Nothing escapes His notice. I'm just limited in my view. I can't see electricity or wind, but I certainly believe in both of them. He answers, but we don't always grasp the answer. I'm not trying to figure out theology that much smarter people than me have spent their lives searching out. I'm telling you I don't understand how the thing works, but should that stop any of us from reaching for more? Because a fourth grader doesn't understand advanced physics, should he quit stretching toward a deeper knowledge of gravity? By no means.

Since we're on the subject of "ask and you shall receive", Stephen asks me to ask you to pray specifically about some sleep problems he is having. He wakes up in the night and can't get back to to dream land. The problem is the fixator. He can't move or turn over, so you can imagine that can make for a tricky night's sleep. I'm telling you, I'm not sure if this devise is from God or the devil! It's keeping his bones in place, but it's cumbersome. And if you hit that hunk of metal and pins, ouch! I don't move around too much in my sleep for fear of knocking into the blasted thing.

Tomorrow is a busy day. At 10am we meet with the Rensselaer County District Attorney to discuss the plan for the criminal case. At 1:00 Stephen will meet the amazing Dr. Hesham, the trauma doctor whose "bold decision" (Hesham's own words) saved his life. Normally when an MVA comes in to the ER, the first move is to cut the patient open and see what's bleeding. Dr. H. had a hunch that all the bleeding was coming from Steve's leg, so he didn't do the usual thing. Good thing, since the man went through 22 units of blood and his pressure hit the floor anyway. As you all know by now, Stephen was touch and go for quite a while. I'm grateful for the skill of the fine doctors and nurses who took care of him. But I know with every fiber of my being that the Great One determines the day and hour of our death. He picked a great doctor to take care of my darling husband. A truly great doctor. In fact, several of them.

Tonite we will dine on ziti prepared by the terrific Miss Lockwood and the health class at Columbia High. Miss L. is also the leader of the SADD group at the school, and Joseph's teacher. I had the pleasure of meeting her at the DWI checkpoint I attended back in December. Thankfully I had taken the ziti out of the freezer yesterday. Why thankfully you ask? Well, our chest freezer died this weekend (it is about 17 years old). At least the weather is cooperating until we can get another one.

Smitty enjoyed watching football with Mark the Lion Hearted today. Mark already has plans to get the man tossing horseshoes with his left hand. I think Mark has the gift of seeing something before it exists. I think he has a picture in his mind of a beautiful sunny day, and Stephen standing upright, and hamburgers on the grill and horseshoes flying and bees buzzing and flowers growing. Or maybe it's my picture. Or maybe many of ours. With the Great One, all things are possible. I especially love His sunny days...

It's Sunday evening, and I'm writing a bit earlier today. I'm looking forward to Mickey Rooney and Judy Garland tonite, and tomorrow is a school day. The next movie in our cue after "Andy Hardy" is "Charley's Aunt" with Jack Benny. My favorite Jack Benny movie is "George Washington Slept Here" with Ann Sheridan and the great Percy Kilbride. I was going to make a cake, but I'm out of gas. Dessert will be Chip's Ahoy's tonite, with a glass of milk. Sounds perfect to me.

I have received some beautiful and incredibly kind comments. I'm sorry I can't respond all the time. Believe me, if I had an ounce of extra energy I would. I know you all understand. Please know the comments and offers of help are like aloe on a sunburn. You sure know how to cheer a gal up! I bless you for it. Thank you for the love. And to all of you, even if you don't comment I know you're out there. I hear about it and it makes me glad. I send the love back at ya'. I'm asking the Great One to give you and I "wisdom and understanding, that we may know Him better"... I'm getting a revelation that that's what prayer is really all about.

Your friend on the pilgrim road,

Loriann