Hello, friends. This is Stephen, filling in for Loriann for possibly the last time. (Try to keep the cheering to a minimum!)
Today was my last day of outpatient therapy at Sunnyview, and that inspired mixed emotions from me. On the one hand, I'm very happy that my progress has been good enough - miraculous, practically - that I can be discharged. On the other hand, though, I'm going to miss the people that I know there, and even the place itself. Sunnyview has been a big part of my life since the day after Thanksgiving last year, when I was still so weak that I could hardly lift my head up off the pillow in my bed. That's ten months of my life, a long stretch by any standard. More than the place, though, I'll miss the people that I've met there, especially the therapists who have helped me along the road of my healing. People like Brian, Mary, Becka and especially Sandy, who's been my Occupational Therapist for the last 8-1/2 months. (You can pretty much have a baby in that amount of time!) She's pushed me when I needed to be pushed and held back when that was needed. She's a terrific therapist and a wonderful person (I think that Loriann called her a nice pitbull once in these pages, or words to that effect) and I'm going to miss having her in my life twice a week.
There were a couple of others, no longer with Sunnyview, who were in my life again this week for the first time in quite a while. At lunch on Tuesday I drove to the new place of employment for my occupational therapist when I was an inpatient at Sunnyview, Jacob. Loriann mentioned him more than once last year when he was seeing me on a practically daily basis, but this reference (made the day before I was discharged) has always been my favorite: "Excellent Jake (who also is an army reservist with a heart of gold and a year in Iraq behind him), Holden's dad, told us how his boy likes to play with the manger set. Sometimes he makes Jesus ride the camel (don't you just love it!). And sometimes he simply puts Jesus in his pocket and carries Him around everywhere he goes. I want to be like Holden!" Loriann and I have talked about that more than a few times since then, the wonderful thought of carrying Jesus around in our pockets. Of course, Jesus has given us an even better option - carrying Him around in our hearts all the time. I saw Jacob this week because I wanted to hand deliver to him an invitation to our Smith Family Thanks You Dessert Night. Have you heard about it? I believe that Loriann's mentioned it once or twice or twenty times. Anyway, I wanted to make sure that Jacob knew about it and knew we'd love to have him there. I don't think I'll ever forget the day he came to my room instead of waiting for me to get to the gym, tossed me my clothes and said, "Well, get changed." Up until then the nurses had been getting me dressed every day, and it hadn't even crossed my mind that I might be able to do it myself. That's like God, too - often He'll let us be helped with something, by Him or by others, but sometimes He reminds us that the time has come for us to take a stand, or stake a claim, and that He knows that we can do it even if we might have our doubts. I'm not sure if Jacob can make the Dessert night, but hopefully he can and a bunch of you can meet him there.
The other person I was able to get in touch with this week, no longer with Sunnyview, was a the lady who was the head nurse for my section when I was there. Although she was the head nurse, and no doubt had approximately a million things to do, she was one of the two nurses who changed my bandages when they needed to be changed - and back then, if you'll recall, I had a lot of bandages that had to be changed three times a day. (Both legs, and one arm.) I had never forgotten her kindness and was thrilled this week to be able to contact her via Facebook. She had gotten the invitation I had left for her and she'll be able to come on the 23rd. One more blessing that the Fabulous Tracey is giving to me and my family!
Well, this post has gotten longer than I expected, and I'm getting pretty tired. Soon my bride will be home, so I'm going to want to spend a little time with her. If you're planning on coming to our Smith Family Thanks You Dessert Night and you haven't let us know yet, please take a minute to do so. E-mail us at smittythanks@gmail.com and let us know, so we can look forward to seeing you (or meeting you, even!).
God Bless. Today on the radio I heard the song "My Redeemer Lives" and it's been in my head ever since. He does live, and I'm so glad about it! (Your Redeemer lives too!)
Your other friend on the Pilgrim Road,
Stephen
Thursday, September 30, 2010
Wednesday, September 29, 2010
Day 324 Hemorrhage to Homecoming
Dear friends,
We are closing in on the one month countdown for this blog. I can't believe it's been almost a year since the hurricane in the form of a drunk driver smacked into us. And when I say us I include YOU, because everyone who reads here has been impacted by November 8, 2009.
A few bullet points for tonite, since I'm going to the mall with my princess to look for a dress for her for the homecoming dance. Which all by itself is a miracle beyond reason. I feel that acutely today, and here's why:
At Our Savior's Lutheran School this morning (where David takes Spanish twice a week), I was introduced to an OSL mom, Patty. Turns out she has a daughter in her 30's who was in the car with a drunk driver shortly after she graduated from high school. The long and short of it is the young man got up to a speed of 110 mph,and ran headlong into a house. Two girls in the car were killed, he survived unharmed, and Patty's daughter - traumatic brain injury. She was in a coma for a year, and when she came out was helpless and mentally a child. She is currently in a day program at the Center for the Disabled. She was supposed to go to Siena, instead she ended up in a hospital bed. For years Patty has contended with the agony of her daughter's frontal lobe hemorrhage (the same injury as Hannah), and then, only 2 years later, the death of her husband to cancer. I could only cry with her, and express my profound sorrow. I left school with a million feelings - guilt, relief, horror, sadness - and that overwhelming gratitude I catch in waves in the midst of my lack of understanding. Yes, we have our fallout. But why was I spared such utter devastation? I don't know. But since I only see a grain of sand on the beach of the universe, I choose to trust a good and compassionate God to make everything right in His time.
Connie O. is home! Thanks for the prayers. They are still trying to figure out what happened to her. These bodies of ours are some incredible machines, no?
Our dear Dan Lane cannot come to the dessert nite. But I told him I'm going to put up a picture of him, and honor him just the same. The Army needs him to stay put, so we'll party on with him in mind anyway.
RSVP's continue to come in for the Dessert Nite from various quarters. Please get yours in so I have plenty of goodies for all!
I'm going to a writing education conference on Friday. Goodness knows I've had alot of practice clicking the keys over the past 10 plus months. I wouldn't trade it for the world. The Great One and I had a conversation about this public diary, and I've tried to do what I think He was showing me - every day for one year. And what a wind we've ridden. Hurricane gales, tropical storm wind, low pressure breezes; but not all linear. What the heck is on this unpredictable pilgrim road?
I'm off to shop. You all know by now that I'd sooner eat glass. But Miss Rejoice is wanting to look pretty for the dance, and I am so grateful for that I would traipse across the mall of America for her... well, that may be pushing it.
Your friend on the pilgrim road,
Loriann
We are closing in on the one month countdown for this blog. I can't believe it's been almost a year since the hurricane in the form of a drunk driver smacked into us. And when I say us I include YOU, because everyone who reads here has been impacted by November 8, 2009.
A few bullet points for tonite, since I'm going to the mall with my princess to look for a dress for her for the homecoming dance. Which all by itself is a miracle beyond reason. I feel that acutely today, and here's why:
At Our Savior's Lutheran School this morning (where David takes Spanish twice a week), I was introduced to an OSL mom, Patty. Turns out she has a daughter in her 30's who was in the car with a drunk driver shortly after she graduated from high school. The long and short of it is the young man got up to a speed of 110 mph,and ran headlong into a house. Two girls in the car were killed, he survived unharmed, and Patty's daughter - traumatic brain injury. She was in a coma for a year, and when she came out was helpless and mentally a child. She is currently in a day program at the Center for the Disabled. She was supposed to go to Siena, instead she ended up in a hospital bed. For years Patty has contended with the agony of her daughter's frontal lobe hemorrhage (the same injury as Hannah), and then, only 2 years later, the death of her husband to cancer. I could only cry with her, and express my profound sorrow. I left school with a million feelings - guilt, relief, horror, sadness - and that overwhelming gratitude I catch in waves in the midst of my lack of understanding. Yes, we have our fallout. But why was I spared such utter devastation? I don't know. But since I only see a grain of sand on the beach of the universe, I choose to trust a good and compassionate God to make everything right in His time.
Connie O. is home! Thanks for the prayers. They are still trying to figure out what happened to her. These bodies of ours are some incredible machines, no?
Our dear Dan Lane cannot come to the dessert nite. But I told him I'm going to put up a picture of him, and honor him just the same. The Army needs him to stay put, so we'll party on with him in mind anyway.
RSVP's continue to come in for the Dessert Nite from various quarters. Please get yours in so I have plenty of goodies for all!
I'm going to a writing education conference on Friday. Goodness knows I've had alot of practice clicking the keys over the past 10 plus months. I wouldn't trade it for the world. The Great One and I had a conversation about this public diary, and I've tried to do what I think He was showing me - every day for one year. And what a wind we've ridden. Hurricane gales, tropical storm wind, low pressure breezes; but not all linear. What the heck is on this unpredictable pilgrim road?
I'm off to shop. You all know by now that I'd sooner eat glass. But Miss Rejoice is wanting to look pretty for the dance, and I am so grateful for that I would traipse across the mall of America for her... well, that may be pushing it.
Your friend on the pilgrim road,
Loriann
Tuesday, September 28, 2010
Day 323 M.C. Escher and the Bigger Picture
Dear friends,
David and I have moved from studying line in art to shape. In particular, we are looking at the difference between 2 dimensional and 3 dimensional shapes. (For some crazy talent on the 3-D front, check out some of M.C. Escher's pen and inks. Mind boggling!) Now believe it or not, I relate this concept to suffering, and its power to enable us to see things in an additional "dimension" so to speak. Somehow, pain and grief in their various forms, physical, psychological, relational, financial, spiritual, etc.., give the bearer an opportunity to see a layer of life that may have been flat before. If I might use the car crash as an example:
I see physical pain now with an additional dimension. It's not that I never had compassion on people with messed up bodies before, but at this point even someone struggling with foot pain or headaches has my attention. I ponder their daily life - and often marvel at the way those with chronic pain carry on in the everyday. I know a number of fellow pilgrims suffering the aches and hurts that come with the tricky diagnosis of Lyme disease. I know some who work in heavy lifting jobs with arthritis and back pain. That's not even mentioning my friend in a wheelchair for life, or the one with continual digestive problems, or that dear one with a life threatening disease. This added perspective comes from watching daily as my non-complaining Hercules winces every time he stands from a sitting position, and groans quietly every time he moves his legs to turn over in bed. My daughter has frequent trouble with pain in her teeth, a manageable but annoying price to pay for someone else's bad decision. Because I live in the story of these 2 priceless lives, I've gone from a square to a cube in seeing the troubles of others. That's an example of "all things working together for good" that the Apostle Paul refers to. I hope this good fallout from the events of November 8 never goes away. This quote from a Japanese poet about sums it up:
My barn having burned to the ground, I can now see the moon. ~Masahide
I thank the Great One for the healthy, pain free "house" I live in. I know there are no guarantees on this front. Physical pain is no respecter of persons. But should I ever have to walk down that stretch of the pilgrim road (and the likelihood is that someday I will), my hope is that I will get an enlarged view of the grace and mercy of the One and Only. At least I have a couple of beautiful examples at home, and my life is the better for them.
Go ahead and sign up for the dessert nite! There's still time, in fact the caterer has given me until October 14. But please don't wait til the last minute... it will make my life a little less hectic!
Your friend on the pilgrim road,
Loriann
David and I have moved from studying line in art to shape. In particular, we are looking at the difference between 2 dimensional and 3 dimensional shapes. (For some crazy talent on the 3-D front, check out some of M.C. Escher's pen and inks. Mind boggling!) Now believe it or not, I relate this concept to suffering, and its power to enable us to see things in an additional "dimension" so to speak. Somehow, pain and grief in their various forms, physical, psychological, relational, financial, spiritual, etc.., give the bearer an opportunity to see a layer of life that may have been flat before. If I might use the car crash as an example:
I see physical pain now with an additional dimension. It's not that I never had compassion on people with messed up bodies before, but at this point even someone struggling with foot pain or headaches has my attention. I ponder their daily life - and often marvel at the way those with chronic pain carry on in the everyday. I know a number of fellow pilgrims suffering the aches and hurts that come with the tricky diagnosis of Lyme disease. I know some who work in heavy lifting jobs with arthritis and back pain. That's not even mentioning my friend in a wheelchair for life, or the one with continual digestive problems, or that dear one with a life threatening disease. This added perspective comes from watching daily as my non-complaining Hercules winces every time he stands from a sitting position, and groans quietly every time he moves his legs to turn over in bed. My daughter has frequent trouble with pain in her teeth, a manageable but annoying price to pay for someone else's bad decision. Because I live in the story of these 2 priceless lives, I've gone from a square to a cube in seeing the troubles of others. That's an example of "all things working together for good" that the Apostle Paul refers to. I hope this good fallout from the events of November 8 never goes away. This quote from a Japanese poet about sums it up:
My barn having burned to the ground, I can now see the moon. ~Masahide
I thank the Great One for the healthy, pain free "house" I live in. I know there are no guarantees on this front. Physical pain is no respecter of persons. But should I ever have to walk down that stretch of the pilgrim road (and the likelihood is that someday I will), my hope is that I will get an enlarged view of the grace and mercy of the One and Only. At least I have a couple of beautiful examples at home, and my life is the better for them.
Go ahead and sign up for the dessert nite! There's still time, in fact the caterer has given me until October 14. But please don't wait til the last minute... it will make my life a little less hectic!
Your friend on the pilgrim road,
Loriann
Monday, September 27, 2010
Day 322 The Life Blood of the Emergency Room
Dear friends,
What a night! Smitty and I went to Choices 301 this evening to record an audio/video segment to be used with the presentation of our smashed car on a flatbed. The tireless Ed Frank continues to bring the devastation of drunk driving right to the front door, reminding anyone who will listen that it's way more that broken glass and twisted metal. There are people in those cars. Some wind up in prison. Some in hospital beds. And some in coffins.
On our way home, we got a phone call from the dear sister Laurie that a precious member of our congregation, and of our cell group, was in the ER at Albany Med. Two years ago Courageous Connie had a massive stroke, a miraculous recovery and she now goes on to care for many people in her quiet, beautiful way. Send your prayers up for her! She was having some symptoms much like last time, and thankfully her daughter Jessica was on the double getting her into an ambulance and off to the hospital. Steve and I made a detour on the way home and stopped in to the AMC emergency room, and Connie is cheerful and peaceful. The Great One has stayed close by her side lo these many years, and he will stay there. (She spent plenty of time at Albany Med back in November and December, delivering pots of soup and all manner of food to feed Steve's family from distant parts. This is a woman with a heart of gold!)
On our way out of the ER, we ran into "Tammy to the Rescue", one of the 2 main ER nurses who took care of Smitty when he came in on the chopper on November 8. I can't describe the joy the 3 of us shared in the crowded A section (in front of the trauma rooms Stephen and Hannah were in). This dear woman actually had a hand in saving Stephen's life. She told us she had never, ever given anyone as much blood as she gave Smitty. She also said he had to receive a sedative normally given to animals and children, because all the other ones made him crash. Her eyes filled with tears (as did ours) at the memories locked within her forever. She also remembered looking in to Hannah's room and seeing Pastor Greg singing to baby girl. She was overwhelmed by that sight on such a terrible night. She's hoping to make it to our dessert nite, and I hope so too. We want to honor all of these people who were the hands and feet of God in the middle of disaster. May He bless all of them, (and all of you!) for the work of your hands and the love of your hearts.
That's a photo of Steve with the fabulous Ed Frank. I wish I had the camera in the ER so you could see Tammy, who was the loveliest thing I laid eyes on in these 24 hours God has given me. Isn't it amazing, the Great One puts people in our lives for a little while, and they can turn out to mean the world to us. Makes me want to make sure I do some little good to everyone I meet!
Your friend on the pilgrim road,
Loriann
P.S. Don't forget to pray for Connie!
Sunday, September 26, 2010
Day 321 Voyages, Sojourns and Pilgrim Roads
Dear friends,
Sometime in December, one of my favorite books comes to the big screen. I have read all of C.S. Lewis’ Chronicles of Narnia multiple times, but my best choice by far is The Voyage of the Dawn Treader, 3rd in the 7 book series. The opening line of this rich, vibrant adventure is this: "There was a boy called Eustace Clarence Scrubb, and he almost deserved it." I am a virulent fan of Clive Staples Lewis (in case you hadn’t noticed), and two of the things I admire most about his art with the pen are his razor sharp wit, and in the fiction realm, his ability to develop prized, memorable characters. Eustace and Reepicheep the Mouse are the two stars of this book (in my opinion as a Narnia groupie), Eustace for his transformation from detestable to humbled, and Reepicheep for his valiant loyalty and limitless courage.
The real meat of this book, indeed of all the Chronicles, is the concept of the journey, rather than the destination. And that intrigues me. Perhaps Lewis’ ripe imagination for the “voyage” was because, like the rest of us, he himself wasn’t familiar with the destination yet. But with the sojourn he was well acquainted, having lived a life full of hardship and wonder. He was injured in a world war, he went to boarding schools which would make the most stony hearted social worker shudder, he lost a beloved wife to cancer. He had excellent, brilliant friends (among them JRR Tolkien), he was an esteemed professor at Oxford, and he had a career doing what he loved. His life, like all of ours, was a mixed bag. But it was wrapped up in the sovereignty of God, and his works speak to that like no other author I know.
The pilgrim road gives each of us countless opportunities to choose. Choose to be bitter or to forgive. Choose to walk in darkness or light. Choose to be God’s friend or his enemy. One thing we are all familiar with is this: there are roadblocks and steep places on everyone’s ramble through the world. They aren’t evenly distributed either. I have no idea why. Eustace Scrubb is a picture of how one can change when one comes face to face with the road they’re on. He may be a fictional character, but the truth of his myth gives me hope. (Now you’ll have to read the book to see what I mean!) As for Reepicheep, well, I want to BE Reepicheep. His feats of derring do make me want to rise up in all my smallness and take on the powers of darkness. Alas, perhaps I should start by keeping my mouth shut when I ought…
C.S. Lewis has made my life better on the pilgrim road. After much searching and seeking, wrestling and stubbornness, he himself came to know the Great Savior of his soul. And now, he knows a whole lot more about the destination. His voyage on this side of the painting is over. He’s living the “live that is truly life” forever. Anyway, I hope the movie version is good. Otherwise, I feel a hissy fit coming on…
Your friend on the pilgrim road,
Loriann
Sometime in December, one of my favorite books comes to the big screen. I have read all of C.S. Lewis’ Chronicles of Narnia multiple times, but my best choice by far is The Voyage of the Dawn Treader, 3rd in the 7 book series. The opening line of this rich, vibrant adventure is this: "There was a boy called Eustace Clarence Scrubb, and he almost deserved it." I am a virulent fan of Clive Staples Lewis (in case you hadn’t noticed), and two of the things I admire most about his art with the pen are his razor sharp wit, and in the fiction realm, his ability to develop prized, memorable characters. Eustace and Reepicheep the Mouse are the two stars of this book (in my opinion as a Narnia groupie), Eustace for his transformation from detestable to humbled, and Reepicheep for his valiant loyalty and limitless courage.
The real meat of this book, indeed of all the Chronicles, is the concept of the journey, rather than the destination. And that intrigues me. Perhaps Lewis’ ripe imagination for the “voyage” was because, like the rest of us, he himself wasn’t familiar with the destination yet. But with the sojourn he was well acquainted, having lived a life full of hardship and wonder. He was injured in a world war, he went to boarding schools which would make the most stony hearted social worker shudder, he lost a beloved wife to cancer. He had excellent, brilliant friends (among them JRR Tolkien), he was an esteemed professor at Oxford, and he had a career doing what he loved. His life, like all of ours, was a mixed bag. But it was wrapped up in the sovereignty of God, and his works speak to that like no other author I know.
The pilgrim road gives each of us countless opportunities to choose. Choose to be bitter or to forgive. Choose to walk in darkness or light. Choose to be God’s friend or his enemy. One thing we are all familiar with is this: there are roadblocks and steep places on everyone’s ramble through the world. They aren’t evenly distributed either. I have no idea why. Eustace Scrubb is a picture of how one can change when one comes face to face with the road they’re on. He may be a fictional character, but the truth of his myth gives me hope. (Now you’ll have to read the book to see what I mean!) As for Reepicheep, well, I want to BE Reepicheep. His feats of derring do make me want to rise up in all my smallness and take on the powers of darkness. Alas, perhaps I should start by keeping my mouth shut when I ought…
C.S. Lewis has made my life better on the pilgrim road. After much searching and seeking, wrestling and stubbornness, he himself came to know the Great Savior of his soul. And now, he knows a whole lot more about the destination. His voyage on this side of the painting is over. He’s living the “live that is truly life” forever. Anyway, I hope the movie version is good. Otherwise, I feel a hissy fit coming on…
Your friend on the pilgrim road,
Loriann
Saturday, September 25, 2010
Day 320 Going to War with the Enemy Within
Dear friends,
I wrestled over the content of this post. Ultimately I decided to fess up, because I've promised to tell the truth. It's a difficult subject, but it's for real.
Over the last 2 days my darker side has reared its head. I have been struggling with a couple of temptations, both old head games that the bible would call "strongholds". Yesterday was really a rough go, whacking down thoughts and actions that belie who I truly am, threatening to strand me in a dark, isolated pit of sin where I could get messed up good before I chose to come home again. Ironically, one of those strongholds is alcohol. I'm not saying it's wrong to have a drink. But one knows when the mindset is not the pleasure of a special cocktail with a nice dinner, but the diabolical goal of forgetting problems and escaping pain in forbidden ways. Dealing with trouble by excluding the Great One from the picture, and seeking an alternative God. Feeling dissatisfied and seeking satisfaction in a counterfeit. Strangely enough, temptation to sin was much less palpable in the midst of some of the worst pain in my life lo those 10 months ago. No doubt there are times when disaster could drive someone to addiction and vice. But I found myself graciously free of that battle for a while. While we walk on this planet, though, there will be another temptation around the bend. It's common to all men. And it won't go away til we're dead.
The dark lords that call us are different for each soul. My dear friend who knew God did not want her watching soap operas duked it out with that one for years before she gained her victory. I have never, ever been tempted to watch a soap opera. For her, soap operas had become an idol, and the Great One wanted her to let them go for the sake of her freedom. It was a hard, rocky road with many setbacks, but she's got her liberty, and she's ever vigilant lest that thing get its tentacles around her again. Only you know what that thing is that could kill your body, relationships, calling, purpose, even your very soul. The Lord says when we are tempted, He will always provide a way of escape. Sometimes we see the safety hatch, and look the other way, hoping God won't notice that we were "tempted beyond our ability to turn". But that's never true. When we sin, we practice the very thing that makes us human: the power to choose. A soap opera seems like nothing - but each man knows his Achilles heel, and the tiniest stone in the shoe can make the pilgrim road a misery over the many miles...
I'm still like a woman on a boat, trying to get my sea legs with these things, choosing one minute at a time to hold on to what is good and right. I'm a little stronger today, by the grace of God, so it's a little easier to choose the light over the darkness. But I must keep a wary eye on my shadows. Telling you about this one is a way of doing that. (Hiding in the dark perpetuates the problem). That sly enemy of the souls of men can't hurt God, so he goes after the apple of His eye. All the while our Rescuer is saying, "get in the lifeboat, son, and you'll be safe". What a Savior!
If you've already landed in that pit of darkness, let me tell you I've been there too. And the One and Only is always on the ready to pull us the heck out of there. Repentance is a happy word, not a shameful one. It's the key in the lock of restoration. We'd be fools to stay in the garbage dump when our Father wants to bring us out into the place of peace. Always, though, the choice is ours.
How I wish I didn't have to admit to my own weakness! But if I'm gauging this thing right, I've got a feeling the rest of you have your seasons of temptation too. Our culture doesn't help much either. So maybe you'll be encouraged to know that I'm really going to pray this week for all the bloggies in that area in particular. The Dark one wants to take us out, with a car accident or by making us cave from within, or by any number of schemes. But he's no match for the King of Goodness and Light. Be strong, friends, and go to the right God to meet your deepest needs.
Your friend on the pilgrim road,
Loriann
I wrestled over the content of this post. Ultimately I decided to fess up, because I've promised to tell the truth. It's a difficult subject, but it's for real.
Over the last 2 days my darker side has reared its head. I have been struggling with a couple of temptations, both old head games that the bible would call "strongholds". Yesterday was really a rough go, whacking down thoughts and actions that belie who I truly am, threatening to strand me in a dark, isolated pit of sin where I could get messed up good before I chose to come home again. Ironically, one of those strongholds is alcohol. I'm not saying it's wrong to have a drink. But one knows when the mindset is not the pleasure of a special cocktail with a nice dinner, but the diabolical goal of forgetting problems and escaping pain in forbidden ways. Dealing with trouble by excluding the Great One from the picture, and seeking an alternative God. Feeling dissatisfied and seeking satisfaction in a counterfeit. Strangely enough, temptation to sin was much less palpable in the midst of some of the worst pain in my life lo those 10 months ago. No doubt there are times when disaster could drive someone to addiction and vice. But I found myself graciously free of that battle for a while. While we walk on this planet, though, there will be another temptation around the bend. It's common to all men. And it won't go away til we're dead.
The dark lords that call us are different for each soul. My dear friend who knew God did not want her watching soap operas duked it out with that one for years before she gained her victory. I have never, ever been tempted to watch a soap opera. For her, soap operas had become an idol, and the Great One wanted her to let them go for the sake of her freedom. It was a hard, rocky road with many setbacks, but she's got her liberty, and she's ever vigilant lest that thing get its tentacles around her again. Only you know what that thing is that could kill your body, relationships, calling, purpose, even your very soul. The Lord says when we are tempted, He will always provide a way of escape. Sometimes we see the safety hatch, and look the other way, hoping God won't notice that we were "tempted beyond our ability to turn". But that's never true. When we sin, we practice the very thing that makes us human: the power to choose. A soap opera seems like nothing - but each man knows his Achilles heel, and the tiniest stone in the shoe can make the pilgrim road a misery over the many miles...
I'm still like a woman on a boat, trying to get my sea legs with these things, choosing one minute at a time to hold on to what is good and right. I'm a little stronger today, by the grace of God, so it's a little easier to choose the light over the darkness. But I must keep a wary eye on my shadows. Telling you about this one is a way of doing that. (Hiding in the dark perpetuates the problem). That sly enemy of the souls of men can't hurt God, so he goes after the apple of His eye. All the while our Rescuer is saying, "get in the lifeboat, son, and you'll be safe". What a Savior!
If you've already landed in that pit of darkness, let me tell you I've been there too. And the One and Only is always on the ready to pull us the heck out of there. Repentance is a happy word, not a shameful one. It's the key in the lock of restoration. We'd be fools to stay in the garbage dump when our Father wants to bring us out into the place of peace. Always, though, the choice is ours.
How I wish I didn't have to admit to my own weakness! But if I'm gauging this thing right, I've got a feeling the rest of you have your seasons of temptation too. Our culture doesn't help much either. So maybe you'll be encouraged to know that I'm really going to pray this week for all the bloggies in that area in particular. The Dark one wants to take us out, with a car accident or by making us cave from within, or by any number of schemes. But he's no match for the King of Goodness and Light. Be strong, friends, and go to the right God to meet your deepest needs.
Your friend on the pilgrim road,
Loriann
Friday, September 24, 2010
Day 319 An Update Like the "Old Days"
Dear friends,
Just a quick update on the Smith family. I realized I'm often off to the races on other topics on many of these blogs, and it's been a while since I filled you in specifically on the health and well being of the Meadow Lane peeps.
Smitty's recovery has been nothing short of outstanding. Less than a year ago his bones were smashed, his lung collapsed, he had a concussion, and his blood pressure hit 40/20 in the ER. Today he works out on the elliptical faithfully every morning for an hour, is back to work full time, (sharp as a tack, I might add), and is closing in on discharge from Sunnyview outpatient therapy. He has been through 4 major and 3 minor surgeries, and if all goes according to plan, there won't be any more. He is loaded with metal, but moves fairly well, far better than anyone predicted.
Hannah has also exceeded all expectations for recovery. Her young brain is still healing, but she can function well and enjoy relationships - both things that were in the balance last November. She continues to see the dentist frequently as the loss of her 4 front teeth has impacted the movement of the rest of them as she grows. She missed 2 months of school, and still finished the 09/10 school year on the high honor roll (amazing!) For the sake of her privacy, I will leave it at that, and just so you don't overspeculate remember she is on the track of healing. I will never, ever forget that God is for her, and I'm still praying as strongly as ever that she gets "double for her trouble". You betcha.
My boys seem to have survived the disaster in good shape. David, out of nowhere, said to me "November 8 was the worst day of my life". It will always live in his head somewhere, but it will be part of his history, and that includes all the good that he witnessed first hand. Joseph still struggles with anger over the whole thing, but he's an emotional kid, a drama "queen", much like his mama. He processed things like an elephant rather than a lamb. So time will do it's work, and the Great One will find a way to cause this too to work for good in his dear life.
You already know about me. I've been talking to you for 319 days, give or take, and you've watched as I've swung from pillar to post through the jumble of these days. If anything, I hope you have seen how relentless the Great One has been in my life, never giving up on me, my "very present help in trouble". There's no end date to recovery, but there's also no end date to the amazing grace. I'm still tromping along on the pilgrim road, looking for that city "whose architect and builder is God. I have seen the goodness of God in the land of the living. And I'm fixin' to see plenty more.
Dessert nite is coming. Be there, fellow travellers.
Your friend on the pilgrim road,
Loriann
Just a quick update on the Smith family. I realized I'm often off to the races on other topics on many of these blogs, and it's been a while since I filled you in specifically on the health and well being of the Meadow Lane peeps.
Smitty's recovery has been nothing short of outstanding. Less than a year ago his bones were smashed, his lung collapsed, he had a concussion, and his blood pressure hit 40/20 in the ER. Today he works out on the elliptical faithfully every morning for an hour, is back to work full time, (sharp as a tack, I might add), and is closing in on discharge from Sunnyview outpatient therapy. He has been through 4 major and 3 minor surgeries, and if all goes according to plan, there won't be any more. He is loaded with metal, but moves fairly well, far better than anyone predicted.
Hannah has also exceeded all expectations for recovery. Her young brain is still healing, but she can function well and enjoy relationships - both things that were in the balance last November. She continues to see the dentist frequently as the loss of her 4 front teeth has impacted the movement of the rest of them as she grows. She missed 2 months of school, and still finished the 09/10 school year on the high honor roll (amazing!) For the sake of her privacy, I will leave it at that, and just so you don't overspeculate remember she is on the track of healing. I will never, ever forget that God is for her, and I'm still praying as strongly as ever that she gets "double for her trouble". You betcha.
My boys seem to have survived the disaster in good shape. David, out of nowhere, said to me "November 8 was the worst day of my life". It will always live in his head somewhere, but it will be part of his history, and that includes all the good that he witnessed first hand. Joseph still struggles with anger over the whole thing, but he's an emotional kid, a drama "queen", much like his mama. He processed things like an elephant rather than a lamb. So time will do it's work, and the Great One will find a way to cause this too to work for good in his dear life.
You already know about me. I've been talking to you for 319 days, give or take, and you've watched as I've swung from pillar to post through the jumble of these days. If anything, I hope you have seen how relentless the Great One has been in my life, never giving up on me, my "very present help in trouble". There's no end date to recovery, but there's also no end date to the amazing grace. I'm still tromping along on the pilgrim road, looking for that city "whose architect and builder is God. I have seen the goodness of God in the land of the living. And I'm fixin' to see plenty more.
Dessert nite is coming. Be there, fellow travellers.
Your friend on the pilgrim road,
Loriann
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